I will no longer be updating Iron Guide (see below). Instead, I am now writing at my new, personal blog. Though that will be about some of the newer things I'm doing in life, if you want to see updates about Louie, Lester, and now Dusky, add me on Facebook -- there's enough ridiculously cute pictures to go around.

Sometimes, Lester gets confused.

No, not about where to go pee or whether my blanket doubles as a pee pad. That was so last week.

This time, it was about whether to go pee, poop, or both.

To make a long story short, today, Lester and I went by Redmond Town Center to pick up a new hard drive for my dying Powerbook. Before we went into the store, I gave him an opportunity to relieve. No big deal, right? He's been getting 6-8 potty breaks a day for the past month. Standard practice. Knows it like the back of his, er.. paw.

So, we get out of the car, walk over to an empty parking spot, and I stand around, yawning and trying hard to not look bored, while he circles around (and around) trying to find an acceptable pee spot. He must have circled around at least ten times before finally deciding on a spot. He leaned forward as if to pee, then, no, changed his mind, and decided he was going to poop instead and crouched down. Nope. Back to peeing. Lean forward. Nothing. Poop? Yes. Crouch down. Really this time.

What's with all the leaning and crouching? You see, if he's crouched down, his butt points down, which means he can poop. If he's leaned forward, his penis points at the ground, which means he can pee without getting it all over himself. If he's crouched down, his penis points straight up.

So, crouching down, all ready to poop. Ready... set... go! Wait, what? Why are you peeing? Woah, woah. You're peeing! Wait a second, you're peeing right into your face! Eeeeewww.

Disgusting. More than you can imagine. But, for you, my readers, there's a silver lining. Why? As soon as we set foot back in the apartment, Lester was thrown into the tub, dunked in water and given a major scrubdown. His efforts to frantically scramble out of the tub being unsuccessful, there are many, many (very cute) pictures of him looking very forlorn and depressed and many more (cuter) pictures of him looking like a big poof-ball of fur afterwards.

They'll be up as soon as I revive my PowerBook. It's currently in a suspended state of major heart surgery. Don't ask.

Labels: Lester

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